the wings of change

*

elfling is unsure about butterflies, pah-ah-yohn (toddler-speak for papillon), he calls them. he does like butterflies, gasps when he spots one, & stares in wonder until it flits away. the thing is, he also is a bit afraid of them. i haven't figured out why yet.

personally, i am convinced they are faeries in disguise.

thehobbit is still, even at the great old age of 13, mad for butterflies. of course he no longer shows his feelings about them as openly as he once did. these days he will quietly stop what he's doing, stand still, never taking his eyes from the butterflies as they go about their business, then resume his activity.

i do miss the excitement he once exuded around them, but i accept that thehobbit is no longer that little boy. well, i don't quite yet accept it, but i know he has to change. i suppose my sweet little boy was a caterpillar, & now he's a butterfly, wings still damp. i hope he has to sit in the sun for a long time, waiting for those wings to dry.

i am not ready to watch him fly away.

~peace.

unicorns & rainbows

*

can i just say how much i adore life with these boys of mine? when i was pregnant i felt sad that they would be so far apart in age. i felt as though we'd jipped them both of growing up with a sibling, as manlyman & i had. in time i realized that they had not been jipped. in fact, these are some lucky boys indeed. 

thehobbit adores his bebe brother, in a way that is part sibling, part parental. when elfling learns something new, or does something adorable, i see thehobbit reacting the same was as manlyman & i: with a joyful sort of pride. as if he too is responsible for the shaping of this tiny creature. which, i suppose, he is. an unexpected joy for thehobbit, is getting to relive the joys of his own childhood. just as he's tossing off the last remnants of that time, he is finding himself drawn to blocks, stacking boxes, giant legos, & hours spent singing goofy songs.

as for elfling? well what little guy wouldn't love having a third parent? elfling has one more person to comfort him, one more person to carry him, one more person to rock him to sleep, one more person to imitate, & one more person to love him beyond reason. even better than if thehobbit actually were an actual parent - he is still a kid, so vastly more fun to play with. 

please don't think i am saying it's all unicorns & rainbows. 13 year-olds don't like their artwork scribbled upon, nor their intricate lego contraptions broken. &, oddly enough, teens are not exceedingly fond of having toys tossed at their heads. for. no. reason. what. so. ever. 

life is not what i'd imagined it would be like, that's for sure. it is much better. mostly ;)

thanks for letting me gush.

~peace.

lost & found

*

i thought i had long ago lost this cartoon, but found it today! actually, i did lose the original paper version, but hadn't realized i'd taken a photo of it. how fabulous, to stumble upon it!

fellow homeschoolers will recognize this scene instantly. it's a scene played out daily, at libraries the world over, by overly excited parents upon discovering a child's interest in something. i don't think that last sentence even hinted at being grammatically correct.

i sure do miss drawing cartoons. enjoy!

~peace.

what keeps me busy ...

*

 ... & melts my heart.

what is keeping you busy these days?
peace.
(thank you for the lovely hobbity birthday wishes!)

tutorial, thwarted

*

i created a fabulous toy for elfling, & photographed the process to share with you. no woohooing though, because blogger isn't allowing me to upload photos today. i tried for quite some time, it just isn't working. stupid blogger.

have no fear, my one & only reader, for i shall try again tomorrow! assuming i do not forget, that is.

until then...

~peace.

a boy with two mamas to love

*

my wee boy is happiest out of doors. he loves most everything about it, is at one moment made giddy by it, the next, is made peaceful.

his favorite thing is to sit alone on the grass. he quietly runs his hands over it, picks at it, pulls up longer strands, tears them to teeny bits, & begins again. it's as though he is trying to know the very essence of the grass.

usually we'll find a lovely bit of grass, or a teensy stick, clutched tightly in his hand long after we've come indoors.



the day i took these photos he wanted nothing to do with me & my pesky camera. i was trying to get some good shots of his face, for far-away relatives, but he would have none of it. we were intruders, my camera & i.

finally i gave up trying, & left him to indulge his love of mother nature. i wasn't the least bit jealous that he preferred her to me. well, perhaps a bit...

~peace.

honey, i'm home!

*

did you miss me? did you even notice i was away? no? NO? & you call yourself my one & only reader. dreadful.

we have been up to our ears in busy these days, & i'm afraid i've not quite gotten the hang of balancing it all. not to mention, mercury has been in retrograde in the most fiercest of fashion! most years i can get the whole way through with only the most casual oh, is it in retrograde? not so this time, not so.

do not fret that this shall be the way of things. i've purchased two calendars to keep me on schedule, dropped a few (some temporarily, others permanently) have-tos, & let thebelfry slip into complete & utter chaos.

with my mind less flabbergasted, it is my hope to be back to regular posting this week! hurrah!

so what's with the photo, you ask? nothing. elfling got hold of my harry potter specs, & i happened to be near my camera. he truly is an odd thing - cannot abide hats on his head, but adored having those on his face.

though, speaking of monsieur potter: i am working on new (free) pdfs for hogwarts homeschool, as well as sets(not free) for the soon-to-be-open hh shop! more about that last bit later :)

alas, our visit has come to an end. the wee one is now awake, & i must go snuggle him. see you tomorrow.

~peace.

children are wretched

*

change is on the wind.

recently thehobbit filled a mess of bags with things i don't need anymore. in poking through them i discovered nearly every toy he owns. it broke my heart to see all he'd cast aside. this doesn't come as a total surprise; a few months back he gave me his pirate ship, castle, & collection of wooden swords to pack away for elfling. since, there has been a trickle of items added to the pile. but this latest, this was him telling us he is done with a part of his life.

often these days i see him slouching, wearing headphones, his mp3 player stuck in his pocket, a slight scowl on his face. to me that seems such a teen thing, & that is the very thing sucking the air from my lungs: teen. in just 5 short months my firstborn will be one of those walking bewilderments. wow.

lately, at gatherings, i've been watching thehobbit & his friends. their play has taken on a more hanging out feel to it, they are all nearing my height (or have passed it), & all of them only slightly resemble the kids i've known for so many years.

all of this proves what i have always said: children are wretched.

~peace.

one.

*

today my sweet elfing is one. there is so much i should say about this past year, about this child & how he has changed who i am. i should tell you about the joy he's brought, the way my heart has expanded beyond what i believed possible, or a million other touching & profound things. the thing is, i cannot.


my emotions are playing me fiercely today, & i find i am unable to give voice to any of it. please understand, & forgive me my silence. thank you for being a part of my journey from family of three, to one of four. i am glad you are here.

to celebrate elflings birthday, i am offering all sorts of fabulousness in theshop!

* all mini buntings are half off their original prices!

* a free prezzie with every birthday crown & birthday tiara!

* free shipping on all purchases over $40.00!! (yes, even to your corner of the world!)

please spread the word about the celebratory fabulousness - no hogging the love! & please, please, please go eat some cake.

~peace.

i've got the rule-breaking blues

*

in all the years we've chatted, i've never shared photos of thehobbit's face. sure, there have been glimpses here & there, but never enough that you'd know him were you to see him walking down the street. it was a rule i made when starting out on this journey: no photos of faces.

why kat? why are you breaking the rule? i honestly do not know. i just saw this photo, & felt it belonged here. perhaps it's because of who he is now, no longer my teeny guy that i feel i must hide from the bogey man.

that photo speaks for itself. my teeny, shy, long-haired boy in fancy clothes has grown into this. this, i have no idea what. he's a little guy now: independent, sure of himself, arms raised high as if to say here i am world! too bad he can't say it in a top hat; i miss his fancies so.

yes, i am a bit blue. transitions have always been difficult for me. that isn't the reason for the photo's blue tint, however. i did nothing to the photo, it was this way when i downloaded it. strangely, it was the only photo thusly bluedified (real word). it would appear that my camera has a mind of its own.

so there you have it; the face of a hobbit. watch out world.

~peace.

blessings

*

i wish you all a glorious mamas' day!

~peace.

i, braggart

*

allow me to brag a moment. what you see above is a sweet/spicy veg & tofu stir-fry, on a bed of sticky white rice. doesn't it look amazingly delicious? i'm told it was - too many allergens for me. i can tell you though, that it smelled soooo darn good.

so why am i boasting about my stir-fry, you ask? well i am not. you see, this meal was made by thehobbit, with no help from anyone. no recipe either. he said he remembered what i put in mine, & just made it. ah-ha! so he does have the ability to pay attention. preteens (she wrote with an eye-roll); sorry, digressing.

anyway, thanks for letting me boast about my little chef. i am one proud mama to be sure.

~peace.

walking in perfection

*

thehobbit came in from checking for ladybugs on our porch, to proclaim it a perfect morning for a walk.

i quickly dressed, found my camera & elfling's sunhat, & headed outside with my boys.

he was right! the air smelled of newly mowed grass, the only sound to be heard was that of birds singing, & the sun warmed our skin - perfect.



we walked, looked at flowers, searched for butterflies, & took photos of nature's beautiful creations.



as well as photos of my beautiful creation.


the warm air soon turned hot, & we were forced back indoors. i don't do well when the mercury is anywhere near hits 80. our walk was lovely while it lasted. perfect, in fact.


i hope your day is perfectly lovely.
~peace.

time flew when i was having fun

*

enter my blog-a-thon give-away here!

i came across this photo, & my heart began to ache. would you just look at how dinky thehobbit was! the stamp says this was taken in aught 3, so that would have made him 5 years old. wow, five. how time did fly.



when i look at thehobbit now, at 12 years, i can barely see that adorably dinky boy. instead i stand eye-to-eye with a lanky, hormonal guy. he's a guy now, a dude.



the thing is, when i close my eyes i see him still as that dinky boy, eyes shut in wait of a dog's kiss. a boy who slept with 2 teddy bears, & 7 stuffed dogs each night. a boy who always had rocks in his pockets, who insisted we draw harry potter's scar on his forehead daily, a boy who had a smile that shone brightly from his huge, dark eyes.



i'd like to keep my eyes closed some days. life with a pubescent guy is rough on a mama's heart. long gone are the stuffed animals, an mp3 player replaced the rocks, there is a blemish on that forehead, & that smile? well, we don't see much of it these days. not a smile that reaches his eyes, at any rate. because, you know, dudes are too cool for that. or something.



occasionally thehobbit does give me a glimpse of the boy; right now he's cleaning the borrowers' house, in hope of luring them back. he hadn't so much as touched the house in the last 6 months! i dare not even acknowledge what he's doing, for fear i spook him. apparently dudes are like beasts in the wild. make too much noise, & the dude abandons the toy, & slinks off to find his headphones.



i'll just sit here, quietly, with my eyes closed.

~peace.



today's fabulous natural kids blogs: inside sqrl & bee studio & the sitting tree & muddy feet & more

in which thehobbit gets help

the day is finally upon us - today is the hobbity boy's number 12 birthday!!! for me that means quite a bit of birthday snuggling, plus a pile of work yet to be done for tomorrow's party. for you it means it's time to draw a winner from the top hat!

i let thehobbit draw the winner. never let it be said that i don't spoil my boy rotten on his special day ;)



& of course, being a great old man of 12, he needed help.




the winner is number 3!!

"Asti said...
Pretty bunting !
Happy birthdays to you :) Have a wonderful time boys !"

yay - congrats asti! email me an addy, & i'll ship the wonky birthday bunting this week.

thanks to everyone for making this a fun give-away. i enjoyed it so much, i just may have to find loads of reasons to give you prezzies.

now i'm off to pay the price for being queen of all procrastinators. anyone want to clean thebelfry, & go to the market for me? no? sigh.

~peace.

promised japanese goodies,

**sign up for the celebratory give-away!!**

with photos even! i hope you landed on something soft when you fainted just now. so what did i get? nothing for me; drat that tiff & her challenge. i did get lots of yummy party snacks, & ingredients for the actual meal - including sweet red bean paste. i find it too sweet, but thehobbit loves it. i plan on using it as frosting on the cupcakes.

another plan is to have them create their own obento. i couldn't afford a bento box for each child, so i bought a pack of disposable ones. i don't like the waste, but i haven't that many plates anyway.

the store has a whole obento section, so i was able to get lots of things to make the activity fun. if you enlarge the photo above you'll see the tools for cutting carrot slices into flowers, & teeny bottles for soy sauce. too darn cute. also, look at these:



on the right are cups that keep food separate. the other???? well that is simply the most fabulous thing ever - a hard boiled egg mold!!! i've seen molded eggs on obento sites, but could not figure out how they were created. here are the directions:



i hope to get to the japanese market today. there were a few things the dollar store didn't carry - including a newspaper. i need that to make bunting. they gave me a stack of ads to use, but i'll need more. plus they were mostly pink. thehobbit probably doesn't want an all-pink bunting strung everywhere ;)

that's all for today. i am off to look up how far ahead i can make a platter of inarizushi. au revoir! (still no energy to look up 'goodbye' in japanese.)


~peace.

how i spent my day at disneyland

yesterday was our fare-thee-well trip to disneyland. it's been a fun few years, but after talking it over, we decided to spend the annual pass money on other things.

it was a lovely day, crisp & chilly, but the skies were clear & the sun kept us warm enough. there were very few people there, which meant no lines for the menfolk, & no stress for me. i don't do well in crowded places.

elfling (we stopped calling him lemondrop long ago - figured it was better to forget he ever had that scary start in life) had such fun. he's a people watcher of the highest order, & loves being out of doors. this was the perfect place for him.

when the menfolk were on rides, elfling & i would sit on a bench to nurse, & listen to the birds singing. he would get the sweetest, milky smile each time he heard them. i wish i'd taken a picture.

i did get one of those "my view" photos we chatted about the other day, however:

i could have done a series just like this! all photos of me sitting somewhere with thebebe either in my lap, or sling. i should have, that would have been funny: how i spent my day at disneyland. this photo would have been titled riding the tram. hmm perhaps we should renew just my pass, & i could start a blog about it. ha!

have a wonderful day, do!

~peace.

wish i was here

right here, to be exact:


my children bring me immeasurable joy, & i love every single moment i spend with them. ok, that last bit was not altogether true. i couldn't even type it with a straight face. let's try that again, shall we?

my children bring me immeasurable joy, & i love spending time with them. every now & again. heeheehee.

as much as i love being a homeschooling, attachment parenting mama, there are days when it can wear a person out. today was such a day.

i shan't bore you with the details, suffice it to say i wish their daddy-o was home from work, they were with them at the far end of the belfry, & i was soaking (quietly) in a hot bath.

i'm just sayin'.

~peace.

hello, i'm home.

i've missed visiting with you these past few weeks, but i did need a bit of a break. not from you - goodness no! - just a break to clear my head. now that the cobwebs have been cleared, i am ready to get back to things. i'll start by showing you the little teapot we chatted about; the one that i love, love, love.

it's simply perfect in every way. i had no intention of shutting it away in some dark cupboard, but as legomania has o'ertaken the dining table, i thought it best to move it from there. the only place i could be sure it would not be broken was, alas, the dark cupboard. fortunately its cups are there, so it's not too lonely.

***

though i'd not been chatting here, i had been reading others' blogs. i am so impressed with all the crafting & cooking that's been going on. wowza, you people are amazing! i had no time/energy to make things this past holiday season, so relied solely on mail-order. i'm thankful for that, but i missed creating for the people i love. next year i shall a) insist on a handmade xmas, & 2) steal many of your ideas.

the bonus for not wearing myself out the past few months means that i am rested (hahahaha) for thehobbit's birthday party next month. happily he's insisting on only 5 friends, but the theme is going to require a lot of work: japanese. don't say oh that's not too much work, because you don't yet know what i know. he wants them to make their veg sushi at the party. oh the prep work...

wait!!! i just realized that means i'll have to go to my japanese store!!!!! can you see me doing the happy dance? i still won't be able to buy anything for myself, but i will get some yayas out by getting all the fun sushi accoutrement, as well as party favors. ooh. now i'm looking forward to the party. ok, i can do this.

ooh, i can make bunting to hang all over the house - using japanese newspapers for the triangles! ok i have to go make a list now, whilst the thoughts are still in my swiss cheese brain.

have a glorious day please.

~peace.

in which my bebe gets a booboo

fortunately, it doesn't seem to be bothersome.

~peace.