23 March 2009

ramblings of a monday morn

mondays are usually set aside for family time. being manlyman's only day off each week, we try to never schedule activities that aren't family-focused. the occasional homeschool events, or golf tournaments being the exceptions. today is one of the latter. manlyman is playing a qualifying round for some future golf tournie, blah, blah, blah thing.

usually when he's away on a monday with his mistress golf, it's nothing but crabbiness at the belfry. thehobbit & i both want to be with daddy-o, so we take it out on each other. not purposely mind you, but it happens.

for some reason that isn't happening today. we both woke peacefully happy, & it doesn't seem to be dissipating. thehobbit began his day by chatting at my belly, then reading a book to mo (mortimer-slivertongue the fish), then making his own breakie, then explaining the fish-poop-powered submarine he's inventing, & is now writing a story about some boy named paul, whilst listening to a documentary on penguins.

i've been quietly sitting here with my cup of decaf soycreamy goodness - watching him, & marvelling at who he is. wishing i could capture some of that brilliant sparkle for myself. i too had it as a child; the combination of non-stop thinker & constant dreamer; but somewhere along the way it got lost. or maybe it's still there, deep within me, & it was only i who got lost from too many years of trying to fit in.

it's wonderful to be a witness to it in my child. some days i admit it overwhelms me, & i think how much easier life would be were he normal. of course i wouldn't have him any other way, & doubt i'd do well with a normal child; but still - easier would be lovely some days.

not today however. today the peaceful happiness is washing over & through me, & is heightening my awareness of how truly lucky i am. what in the world would i have done with a normal kid? truth be told, i'd much rather have a too-long discussion on string theory, than a shorter one on spiderman's powers.

i'm not knocking normalcy, it's just not for me. it was never who i was, nor a world by which i was ever fully accepted. i suppose some kids get lucky, & are born to the perfect parents for them. thehobbit definitely was - though there are days manlyman does raise a confused eyebrow at what goes on here. he's only mostly odd, that man of mine.

sure manlyman is away on our family day, & sure i'm bummed about it - but i think today will be a happy day anyway. i just wonder if thehobbit will agree once i tell him we have to deep clean his horridly filthy playroom. we can't put it off another day - the dust bunnies are beginning to complain.

i hope your day is filled with a peaceful happiness!
~peace.

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