16 October 2008

in which i share my thoughts

change is in the air, i can feel it. not the autumnal change, nor the serious changes the world is facing - this one is all mine. the feeling has been creeping up slowly for a time now. i'd sense it ever so slightly, but it would disappear if i stopped to ponder.

i don't know what the change will bring, but i don't feel foreboding, or a sense of dread at all. what i do feel is a tingling charge, like someone, somewhere is whispering fantastic things to me, & if i crane my head forward just enough, i'll hear wonderous secrets.

i think i'm ready; or as near ready as i'm ever able to be. i know i am ready to take kats in the belfry beyond blogdom & shows. partly because i can finally upload photos at the speed of faster-than-dirtitude (real word,) but also because i'm ready to succeed. i have never been one to put off, or keep from doing something for fear i'd fail. what's kept me from going forward with many things over the years has been success. does that make sense? i see heads nodding - i know you're out there too, my fellow freaks who are afraid of what comes after (or with) the end of the rainbow. dangit! now i have who's afraid of virginia wolff in my - no! & now who's afraid of the big bad wolf, the big bad wolf, the big bad wolf? is playing in my head. rats & fleas.

the other changes? i honestly have no idea. i probably should sit down, & really give it some thought. try to figure out where i should be going, or looking, or something. the thing is, i just don't want to. i want; & this is a first for me; to just discover it when it is ready to be discovered. i have no desire ok a little, but only a very little to control this, this whatever it is that is headed my way.


this morning manlyman told me his concerns for my health. there was no way i could argue that, so i didn't bother trying. i decided i'm done with eating poorly, & done with what has become a sedentary lifestyle. i'm not a sickly woman, but i do have genetically high cholesterol, & heart disease runs in my family. so, yeah. it's time.

today marked my last caffeinated drink, & last day without exercise. yes i know the day is not yet over, that there is plenty of time for a good yoga session at least. the thing is: i believe strongly in marking occasions in a grand way. it wouldn't do to spoil the grandeur of tomorrow, by beginning a portion of my journey tonight :-D


just think! one day soon you shall come to visit me, & find a fit, skinny woman, with a thriving bizzie, giddy from all her new adventures, & happily celebrating the first black man to be elected president in the united states. i cannot wait.



~PhaedraPhoenix~ said...

Wowsa woman...now is as good a time as any...being 28 an all...

kat said...

i mean how many times must one turn 28 before one gets it right?

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