08 June 2008

some ruddy bird named errol

at the start of the term last autumn, thehobbit received regular owls from his professors at hogwarts. occasionally his owl post box contained something fun like a trinket, or copy of the daily prophet.

during the winter holidays the owls came less frequently, with the last one arriving just after the dawning of the new year. he checked daily, & asked constantly where his owls were. i gave every excuse i could come up with, & eventually he stopped asking - about the same time that i ran out of reasons to explain my laziness the mysterious lack of post.

he was sad. i knew this, & kept meaning to arrange more owls, but i was so lazy busy. plus i was vying for 'worst mama of the year', & knew that not doing something simple; that gave him such pleasure; would surely win me that title.

not to be outdone, the other mamas decided they too must win 'worst mama of the year', & promptly gave up owls. they both claim they got too busy as well, but i know better. they are a sneaky, diabolical lot. i digress.

we had an official meeting (that's code for 'putting down our teacups',) & decided that for the summer term we'd not create potterfied hand-outs for each lesson, & focus that energy on owl post instead. we are nothing if not brilliant.

last night i printed thehobbit's hogwarts homeschool acceptance letter, & snuck outside to put it into the owl post box. when he woke today:

k: (oh so casually) you know, this tuesday is the start of summer term at hogwarts.

th: yay! (jumping out of bed to do the happy dance) i haven't had hogwarts in forever! (2 weeks)

k: did your letter arrive yet?

th: (saddest face ever) no mama. remember i don't get owls anymore.

k: about that - i finally learned why you stopped getting them.

th: why?

k: it turns out the owl that was assigned to us was trained by errol.

th: aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah. (nodding as if to say 'say no more')

k: it's all sorted out, & the school has assigned us a new owl.

th: what is his name?

k: (oops)

th: mama?

k: i didn't ask, but i will. (quickly changes the subject) so you should start checking your owl post box daily.

th: (runs out of the bedroom, then out onto the front porch) (squealing...) mama! mama! post! there's post! it's my acceptance letter!

k: (damn. i think i just lost my chance at winning that title.)


*note: if you have yet to read the harry potter books, then this post has confused you beyond measure. a) sorry about that, & 2) get reading!*

** edited to add: before i get any emails of concern about thehobbit:he knows that owls aren't actually delivering mail from hogwarts. he knows that the aunties & i are responsible. he is 10 after all. he has a freakyhuge imagination, & a strong desire to believe. so i just keep acting as though it is all real, & he happily makes believe. occasionally i get an eye-roll or two, but they stop once i ask if he wants to stop having hogwarts. thanks in advance for your concern.**

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